I can't help but wonder what would've happened if I would've actually gone to California for school to achieve my goal in the fashion industry, would Matt and I be together today? Or what if he would've taken the job in Boston, would we be living in Ohio again or make Boston our permanent home? All of these things play out to make us who we are today so what's to say we are in complete control of everything that is going on in our lives.
When I was growing up I had plans and certain things I expected to happen in my life. First I wanted to work in the fashion industry and move to California to attend school. Shortly before moving (I actually had everything planned) I chickened out. I felt like I would lose myself out there and the thought of being alone thousands of miles away from my friends and family, I just couldn't do it. So life continues, I then change courses, work full time and go to school part time to decide what I wanted to do with my life. I was an 'undecided' major for the longest time. Matt and I moved to Texas for his job (only a year) then when we moved back to Ohio I felt a passion to go into nursing. I took all of the pre-requisites to get into nursing school and felt I was on the right track. Little did I know I would never pass the entry test that would get me into nursing school. I searched for other schools to attend only to be put on a 2 year waiting list. I decided I needed to have some sort of degree to my name so I just went with an associates degree. Nothing special. I just desperately wanted to be done with school.
Here I am today. I do work at a children's hospital but I am not a nurse. In computer systems actually... who would've thought?!
I'll never know what would've happened if I went to California but it also frustrates me to think if everything happens for a reason why do we try so hard to make things happen?
3 comments:
I've had struggles with that same thought! Where the hell in the world would I be if I'd stayed in ROTC? What would have happened if I'd majored in something that wasn't theatre? I probably would never have met Jonathan. I think truthfully, we do have some say over which paths we choose - but not ALL the say. Sometimes I wonder if our lives are merely characters in those "Choose Your Own Adventure" novels. I hope mine isn't the one about the boy who gets eaten by a shark...
I think this is a very real question. Sometimes I believe that life is planned out for us, but then sometimes I just wonder about the way things could have gone, had I choose a different path- cuz God knows that I've had a trillion plans that I never followed through with!
More blogs please!
Post a Comment